Saturday, July 28, 2007

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Dear ones,

My second chemo is behind me and in me fighting. GO CHEMO!!!!

On this round, I have not had any debilitating side effects and so continue to feel better and better, more and more myself.

An independent soul as well as a highly social animal, I love being able to take care of myself. In addition to accepting and enjoying more pampering than usual, I have the opportunity to practice the joys of tidying up, organizing, giving things away, and the contentment that comes from having less and gives space the moments of living.

What a gift to take time to reflect on the joys of being in the state of yoga--of movement and stillness, breath and body and soul. Feeling the humidity or the lightness of air, the breeze or the heat of the sun is a revelation. The ego is less and wholeness is perceivable.

I am in the state of profound gratitude of the outpouring of love that is carrying me forward and upward. I am reading poetry and listening to music, keeping company with my favorite comics…and thinking of all my friends and my wonderful family.

I love all the messages of support, inspiration and the wonderful tales of what is going on in your lives and the experiences you share.

I have a new friend, a Buddhist elephant beast with beads named SAMBA SANSIBAR sent from all my students. He is on my bed and perfectly housetrained.

Thank you all.

With gratitude and love,

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Tuesday, July 24th, 07

Dear Friends,

Central Park has become my haven. Just two long blocks from home, and it spreads its arms.

Recent sightings:
-A Westsider butterfly showing the way.
-A family outing that includes two grey parrots, one on each shoulder of the mother. A chat at the park café revealed that one is named Dorian and the other Doreena.
-Many running styles in the finishing loop of the Triathalon and the winners coming in to the sounds of a band and the cheers of onlookers.
-Cheers as ardent and joyful for those finishing hours later, just as much winners.
-The pride of poodles in smallest, small, medium and large from blond to black looking ooh la la, oh so French.

And more:
-Grey Gardens, a real wonder that I had wanted to see but put off, proved that I could stay up until midnight!

-Tomorrow round 2 of chemo will keep me out of crowds for recovery time in rest mode.

I have wonderful reading for my spirit, intellect, and funny bones. I have wonderful listening on podcasts and discs.

Blankets, blocks, straps, and bolsters are here so I can practice.

Smiles and tears of joy in reading your messages and poetry and being able to keep up with your lives through what you are writing on the blog and in notes. Thank you all for giving me the quiet I have needed while at the same time we are staying in touch.

More friends than even I with large imagination could have envisioned.

I am content.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Thursday......July 19th............2007

Last night the strains of the Daily Show wafted out of the television...And I started smiling with anticipation of an unexpected angle Jon Stewart would choose to spin the events of the day. Probably not "the" right angle, but a right angle.

And yesterday I also got back to my bemusement of beloved New Yorker cartoons.

I went to the nutrionist in the Integrative Medicine part of Sloan and learned lots to help me make wise choices. An occassional chocolate IS in my future after the dark greens and variety of other good things to nourish and sustain me.

Had lunch out after the appointment. Good to be able to have a sequence of events.

New York was under water in the morning, complete with a sound and light show.
And the afternoon the water spouted out of a pipe near Grand Central slowing all comers to a standstill.

I am feeling better and better every day and the days are starting to feel more like my days.

Thinking of all of you. I hold you all so dear in my heart. Indeed the present is big enough to hold the past and the future

With love,

Sunday, July 15, 2007

July 15th Ups and Downs

Dear Friends,

I feel more like myself than I have since surgery and chemo.

And there are ups and downs.

My friend since we were college roommates at the University of Wisconsin, Elizabeth Whalley, arrived today from California and will be with me for the next 10 days.

We have all kinds of activities in the offing. Some of the most important are Savasana, resting and sleeping. My recovery depends on this balance.

I continue to be blessed and surrounded by kindness, support, your poetry and stories and all the messages of love.

My white cells are responding to my care and to me. My appetite and enjoyment of food is back!

With love


Thursday, July 12, 2007

July 12 Out and About

Dear ones,

Yesterday, I was out and about with medical appointments bookending my day.

I received education about the projected course of chemo and continue to feel I am in wonderful hands and am doing exactly the right things.

One week after the first treatment, my doctors say that the chemo is already having desired effects. Unlike some chemo that is brutal, I seem to be to be tolerating it and feel better each day.

I can go out for walks and see the sky.

The healing from the surgery is continuing each day.
With love,

Monday, July 9, 2007

A New Week

Dear Friends,

I am loving being at home. One day at a time and one hour too. This quiet time is just what I need.

One of the interesting things is how time changes when it is not filled to the brim. The silence is impressive. And the spread of time from moment to moment.

I am doing what the doctors order and what I know to be healing.

Looking forward to being with you all in body as well as spirit as the time becomes right.


Saturday, July 7, 2007

7/7/07 Home Sweet Home

Great to be home.

All plans full steam ahead....including a wonderful visit with family and grandson, Matthew.

They say I look great, so I am going with hearsay--for now.

Wonderful to sleep in my own clean bed in my own clean space.

The apartment is cool and comfortable and so am I.


Friday, July 6, 2007

The Sixth of July == More Independence

Departure Memorial planned for today!

The timing is good as I am strong enough to go home to the West side.

It will be good to get back home, and I have plans in place for the care I need.

One of the side effects of great spirits is the possibility of I explored yesterday. So I will be guarding my sleep, rest and quiet time to do my big job...

To all of you who are with me in this journey, know that I am reaching out to each of you in spirit and would be in a more concrete way if I could and do the work of geting well simultaneously.

The messages of hope and wisdom and healing and lightness are the treasure of this time.

With love,

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

The fourth of July

Dear friends,


Second chemo a great sucess. So I am right on track. And this treatment should make me feel better, hooray, as well as make me start getting better!

Since the hospital stay ended longer than expected, I am skipping the Philadelphia hospitality and will go directly to my home on discharge in a few days.

My computer seems to respond to blogging but I cannot so far send email out, so that will have to wait. They have technology a plenty here but no nurds in evidence.

The care continues to be great, and I have a angled view of the river which might work for fireworks tonight. We will see.

Today I intend to go to the 15th floor where there is a patio because the laps around my floor, even on my MBT's, could use a little more view...

A great 4th to you all. The only time I seem to tear up is when I contemplate the love that surrounds me.


Monday, July 2, 2007

Big Guns

Big day! After clearing the ins and outs required by the hospital, and getting back to normal living, I'm onto the next big thing. I am welcoming my first treatment of chemo today. Getting the big guns in to help me fight is the right thing to do for me. So I'm counting on it, and the wonderful love of my family, and the friends who become family through their actions, and all of you who are holding me in your hearts to be an invincible team. In musing on today, I find there's a curious intersection that I don't know has been noted before between science and religions in which, somehow or other, female human hair becomes a point of interest. So, in the interest of science and with a bow to religions, I'm happily releasing mine, knowing that it will grow again - perhaps curlier this time.

I know chanting is heavenly and earthly. Dispite the difficulties all New Yorkers bring up about crosstown transportation, no problems here. And there was chanting fron all directions from all areas. The quiet reflections, joy, chanting and prayers of all forms are in my consciousness.

So, onwards and upwards!